Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I finished reading the evil Pesticide Manual Yesterday! Done! It was horrible, but I read the whole damn thing! If it weren't a 3-ring binder and all, I would have spiked it like a football. Yay, me! By the way, did you know that symptoms of yellow phosphorous Rodenticide poisoning include glowing and smoking feces? I sure didn't.

Me : 1, Evil Pesticide Manual : 0

I got done about 1/2 hour before I was supposed to leave for my class. I decided I would grab some grocery-store sushi and eat lunch at home while doing a little blogstalking. Then, all relaxed and amused, I could head off to class.

While I was planning this in my head and patting myself on the back for beating the Evil Pesticide Manual, and also listening to Chub Creek, because you can't listen to funny podcasts while reading Evil Pesticide Manuals, I pulled into our parking lot. I carefully grabbed my iPod, my plastic grocery bag of sushi (and a dark chocolate bar), and my purse. I locked and slammed the car door. And I walked up the stairs to discover I HAD NOT GRABBED THE KEYS BECAUSE I WAS TOO BUSY CONGRATULATING MYSELF!

Me : 1, Evil Pesticide Manual : 2

Did I mention one of the things I wanted to grab at home was the cell phone?

So, since none of the neighbors were home, I decided I'd better walk and find a phone. I went to the gas station a few blocks away. The pay phone there is out on the corner of a 5 way intersection, and it seems to be the place where many of the people living in the less-than-comfortable housing above the downtown storefronts make most of their calls. So there were people waiting for me to finish dialing the 300 numbers to use my pre-paid calling card. And Carl was not at his desk. And since the only people who share his phone line at work are himself and me, I knew no one was going to answer so I could leave a message.

Me : 1, Evil Pesticide Manual : 4

I started walking. It was only about a mile and a half to work, so I knew I could be there in 20 minutes or so. Oh yeah, and I was still listening to Chub Creek, and still clutching my Wegmans bag with my sushi in it. I'm one of those people who just isn't right if I wait to long to eat- I either yell at people or I start crying. That's why I kept my lunch with me, clinging to the notion that I was going to be able to eat soon. After about 3 more blocks, it started to rain-

Me: 1, Evil Pesticide Manual : 8

Hard.

Me: 1, Evil Pesticide Manual : 29

In the end, soaking wet and very grouchy, I got to work, found Carl and Fantastic Boss lent us his car so we could go home and unlock ours and I could retrieve my keys. The rain pretty much stopped once I got to work. It only rained for the time I was walking.

After class, I went home and had some knitting therapy. I felt better.

I guess I shouldn't disrespect the Evil Pesticide Manual.

P.S. I'm getting close on that sock. Really, I'm going to finish something one of these days and post a picture!

1 comment:

Jenn said...

Hilarious writing style! loved it!